“Long live living, if living can be this..”

“Did you ever see a man
who did walk down the street,
white robe with no shoes on his feet,
and on top of his head placed a box with two slits,
and the sign from his neck said ‘I do not exist’.”

– lyrics from Miserere by The Cat Empire.

Yes, at first glance this song seems unnecessarily depressing.

But this one song is a very quiet and moving song, and it is truly beautiful. It really struck a chord with me first time I heard it a few years ago.

The man in the lyrics could be lots of things. For some, he is simply a man hiding from society, escaping into his own world. For others, he could be that one guy who you see every day, but who you never notice. That one guy who needs to be recognised. He could be a metaphor for God. He could be all of us, walking in our dark circles, hiding our true identity from the world, from ourselves.

Anyway, I did this on Paddy the iPad yesterday. I realise there’s no white robe, and he’s wearing shoes.. But it seemed more fitting for me to put him in jeans and a jumper.

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This song is so different from the rest of their music – The Cat Empire are a really upbeat, feel-good band from Australia – and they happen to be the only band I’ve seen live. (Big fan of them.) But this is pretty much their only quiet song, and totally different to the rest of their stuff – especially with the angelic voice Felix’s younger brother making an appearance – makes a completely new sound for them.

Most of you won’t have heard of The Cat Empire, they’re not incredibly well known, but if you like happy fusions of lively music and fantastic lyrics sung with sizzling Australian accents.. then The Cat Empire might be for you!

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‘Shroom Doodle.

When you’re sat in some class, bored to death, you often have to resort to using your hand as a canvas, and creating something mildly entertaining.

I’ve always loved how mushrooms look. But not a fan of the taste.

I draw a lot of mushrooms (I get bored a lot), and I’ve been frequently corrected that they’re technically ‘toadstools’.

But to me they are mushrooms. Or ‘shrooms, as they are commonly referred to in my head.

Et VoilĂ ! ..

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Bella Luna..

“Mystery the moon
A hole in the sky
A supernatural nightlight
So full but often right”

Drew this on Patrick the iPad yesterday.. Inspired by a beautiful song by Jason Mraz, Bella Luna. Not one of my favourite songs of his, but wonderful nonetheless. Oh his voice gets me every time..

“Bella luna, my beautiful, beautiful moon
How you swoon me like no other..”

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“You are an illuminating anchor
Of leagues to infinite number
Crashing waves and breaking thunder
Tiding the ebb and flows of hunger
You’re dancing naked there for me
You expose all memory
You make the most of boundary
You’re the ghost of royalty imposing love
You are the queen and king combining everything”

Poncey princes and a rekindled love of The Killers.

Couldn’t sleep a few nights ago, so I listened to all 4 albums of The Killers and conjured up a silly drawing (on Paddy’s whiteboard) of a Prince Charming…

Funnily enough I don’t actually like Prince Charmings much.. they’re too perfect.

Plus, they usually end up being gay. Could be something to do with the rainbow capes, knee-high boots, and frilly socks. Hm.

> > On a side note, it’s been waaaay too long since I listened to The Killers. I listened to nothing else in the summer of 2008, and as a result I seem to have memorised every lyric. Aaah what a beautiful band. I have missed you.

“He doesn’t look a thing like Jesus
But he talks like a gentlemen
Like you imagined when you were young”

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Scared. Sad. Amused.

I’ve attached a sketch I did of a clown to this post, at the bottom. But not your normal happy-go-lucky clown. Nope, a sad clown, with tears dripping down his face. A failed entertainer, even a balloon wilting at his feet.

I don’t like clowns. They scare me.

I hate how they pretend; they physically paint a mask on themselves. They exaggerate their emotions, hiding behind jokes and frolics. They have to smile all the time. They repress their true feelings. I can’t read them like I can read humans.

Also they’re just kinda freaky.

Anyway, I’m feeling a lot right now. Freaking out about my final exams. Sad to be moving out, from the parents I’ve been with almost every day for 18 years. Happy cause they tend to drive me crazy. Tired. So tired. Disappointed in a few ‘friends’. Annoyed at how much I need to feel loved. Confused cause I don’t understand myself. Amused at my failures; all of the above.

But I sympathise with everything that cries. Everything. An axe murderer bursting into tears after killing a baby kitten. He has my sympathy. Perhaps that’s a bit extreme, but you get my point. Crying normalises us. It’s natural. It’s true. It makes us human. So, a crying clown means I have to feel sympathy, I cant help myself. But the fact it’s a clown fills me with fear. I don’t know what it’s feeling. I don’t know who it is underneath the makeup. I can’t tell if it’s just an act.

Didn’t want to go down the emotional route with blogging, but everyone has their days I guess.

On a lighter note, one of my favourite quotes..

“Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain.”

I should get that tattooed inside my brain.

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